“If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.” -Psalms 139:9-10 ESV
I can’t say I was ever really good at the whole not doubting God thing. I was always the type that needed to feel the control or have the “signs” that this would turn out MY WAY – the way I wanted things to turn out without any regards to how maybe God could see things way better than me.
I’m sure all of us go through that phase of life in our teenage years. “Lord, if you just do this than… (fill in the blank).” And I am sure if I was in Ruth’s position and my husband was the one that was diagnosed with blood cancer, I wouldn’t be surprised if I jumped immediately back into old habits with begging and bargaining for his life. The truth is quite frankly, I don’t know how she is even breathing right now, I am not sure I would be as brave in my faith. I hate to admit it. I pray from the bottom of my heart the day God ever has to throw us this kind of bad news that my faith will be strong enough by then to withstand. However, right now, it terrifies me that it would rock my world to the core. That I would make my Lord God sad with my behavior and lack of trust in His plan. As I sit here with a clear head, I am unable to grasp why I would ever not trust His plan even in the worst of times….
Maybe my faith is stronger than I think, or is it my knowledge is growing?
I find myself at a loss of words tonight. This devotional terrifies me, but also I admire her strength and undying faith. I pray for her in this time. I don’t know this woman, but I have read many of her devotionals, and she most likely doesn’t deserve a single bit of this happening to her family, however, does anyone really? I mean who are we to judge that….
My point is we can all claim someone doesn’t “deserve” this or take the cop out and blame God for “this” happening. In the end though, there is always beauty and a lesson to be learned. Something is meant for Ruth’s life right now with her husbands diagnosis, and I pray that for her and their family that that peace comes to light sooner than later. Someone clearly needs her and her story right now, and to share that within the first couple of stories in this book, well it was exceptionally brave.
Dear Lord, tonight I pray for Ruth’s husband, her and all of their family. I do not know them, but You know them Lord. You built them, You have been holding them during this hard time in their lives. You are the one that knows why this is happening and why his body is suffering, and I just pray Lord, that You will allow them to feel peace sooner rather than later in this time of hardship. However, I know your plan is always best, but I can’t help to pray for peace, love and wonderful fun memories made every single day until you decide it is time for any of them to come home. This devotional rocked me, Lord, so I can’t wrap my head around how their poor family must be feeling. I pray for them, good news and good health, peace, and love. I ask this all in Your name, amen.
Resource: Settle My Soul, page 8.